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My sentiment exactly.

:D

C'est la Vie!

O_O

Engine MiVEC 1.6 @ 1.8!!!!

R3 Rims!!!!! Arghhhhhh!!!!

When will I'll be able to buy one? Sigh~ T_T

Had fun (ENVY actually) watching them enthusiastically sooooo into their hobby... T_T

An excerpt from one of the book I've come across while strolling around @ The Curve... Hmmm...

Gotta change my own "commandments" then. Heh.

p/s: Damn bored for the last 2 weeks. Missed the constant arguing then by having no conversation at all. I'm going Siao day by day. Sigh~

=_='

♬ ☊ ☀...

So tired of feeling blue
Such a heavy weight on you
So shake it off
And make your way
To somewhere different
To somewhere different
Oh, no
Now you're leaving me
Oh, what will you do?
All alone
In the big bad world
But I'm not worried, no

'Cause you're
Gonna skip along
Quite merrily baby
You're gonna revel
In hating
What's going on
And you're
Like a sugar bomb
And no harm will come
No harm will come
If you just skip along

Acting oblivious
Comes natural to us
Keep smiling knowing
All the while the world
Will fall apart
The world
Will fall apart

Wouldn't it be lovely
To be home, home
Safe and sound
With no one round
To bring us down
But that's so far away

Frak the 14th. Hahaha.

Lately my life seems like an excerpt from one of Ahadiat Akasyah novels.

Full of drama, uncertainty, insecure kind of feeling running through.

And somehow trying to adapt changes and embracing it is much harder and the same happen when we just wonder around aimlessly and left-out-of-the-loop situation and somehow it kinda pisses me off.

It is the same feeling like when we are working in a company, that we know has a lot of problems and the boss kept telling us that it is ok; just that we know it is not. To the people who don't like to take risk, they left. To some who still put up hopes, they stayed.

Don't know which one that I choose, but if the boss begged me to stay, trust them as I used to be, well, you know the answer.

Been replaying in my mind some terms coined by someone, "Benefit of The Doubt" and now I'm the one living it.

I sure hope this decision is worth it. If it doesn't, I sure hope this experience teaches me to be more aware.

"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." - Thomas A. Edison

Sure hope that it will never be that much high of a number, because I know my limit; it will make me not trusting anyone anymore and I don't want to be irate and toxic for all the time thats left in my life anyway. Life is short. (Dunia la. Akhirat xkire. Haha)

And it sure does take its toll over my life. My old friend Khalis has mentioned me why is it I've been so sensitive lately. I sure took a good long laugh.

Now start the rambling of an "old" man trying to be philosophical.

I have to be sensitive, high in self-aware and be a critics. I've been trained to do so. I am an art student. We will go sick and walk and talk like mindless zombies if our expression and our inner-self blocked by uncertainty; and it does sure surprise others if we do crazy things; and we sure as hell like to do crazy things. Heh.

We are defined by our actions, talks, writings, paintings, whatever medium we can expressed ourselves into. It doesn't matter. We don't do it for money. We do it for pleasure. Satisfaction. Luxury in our own terms. And we sure as hell don't like others to interfere in our affairs.

We do hope the world will be a better place without Anwar and Saiful. We sure hope politics doesn't play the big role in our life; and I believe this word to be so true and rise above all else:

"Ask not what your country can do for you - ask what you can do for your country." - John F. Kennedy.

We do hope our views of the world can change the world, even the slightest that we inspired and expressed "medium"; if it does convey message and do positive a.k.a. good to the others, the satisfaction of it is unbearable.

We don't like money. We believe it as the source of evil. But we do embrace it if it want to become our slaves that do our "bidding".

We sure as hell like to make everyone confused. It is our nature. We do talk cryptically and you need a linguist to decipher our language.

We like to read other's thoughts, and we don't mind letting others read ours.

We do like the chronology of a story. We don't like things to end. We love the pleasure of studying it and in every passing hours; be it hurt by being too plausible or by being to good to be true; we just don't care.

Its the journey that matters.

Adios.

p/s: Yet, it does hurts when dealing with rejection and uncertainty. Time will heal the wounds. Just that we will hurt others in forgetting it. Its how nature works right? False hope and trust sure help us become a better person. Better in giving people happiness OR hurting them. Choose one. Ngeh. ^_^

Yeah!

♫♩...

I know you suffered

But I don't want you to hide

It's cold and loveless

I won't let you be denied

Soothe me

I'll make you feel pure

Trust me

You can be sure

I want to reconcile the violence in your heart

I want to recognize your beauty is not just a mask

I want to exorcise the demons from your past

I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart

You take your lovers that you're wicked and divine

You may be a sinner

But your innocence is mine

Please me

Show me how it's done

Tease me

You are the one

I want to reconcile the violence in your heart

I want to recognize your beauty is not just a mask

I want to exorcise the demons from your past

I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart

Please me

Show me how it's done

Trust me

You are the one

I want to reconcile the violence in your heart

I want to recognize your beauty is not just a mask

I want to exorcise the demons from your past

I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart

Dream-killer?

It sure is funny seeing the all-mighty The Rock aka Dwayne Johnson acting in a comedy but I sure hope the message that the movie Tooth Fairy trying to convey is both inspiring and nostalgic at the same time.

 

Dream Killer. Sarcastic. Hopeless.

What will you react when you have a dream, then you talk happily about it, then someone says in your face your dream will not work out as they had been there before and tells us not to try to hard? And they also give you some kind of example and we do know their intention is good; don't want us to get hurt but the point is, does it matter?

It really is a movie for the moment. The story dares us to take another step after a hefty defeat, and to my amaze I'm quite touch when Trazy aka Tuna Eyes ^_^ even after their big fight comes over to the game and still cheer him up. That's quite a feat and a great support for someone who just lost everything and frankly, a bit of naivety and innocent is what we all need when we dares to hope again. Not the same as repeating the same mistake, just tune back the best attitude and let it flow.

It doesn't matter whether it turns out bad or good. What does matter is that we feel good in what we've done; presently.

Whatever. Don't care. Lantak korang la.

This remark has been made by one that give up hope. And it will be. As Law of Attraction and many religion taught us that what we wish for be will be granted. So it be a prayer for bad and good, we're the one that wish for it and it will happen to us unconsciously. 

We will go bad when we think bad. We will be good when we think good.

And I hold true to this word and strife to always think good. Positive.

A quote from some website I've come over is quite interesting:

"Bruce Lee, the legendary martial artist, once told a story about a highly-educated man who went to a Zen teacher to ask and acquire knowledge about Zen. As the Zen teacher began to explain things, the man would frequently interrupt with remarks like, "Oh, yes, we have that too…”

Finally the Zen teacher stopped talking. He began to serve tea to the man. He poured tea into the cup until it was full, and then kept pouring until the cup overflowed. "Enough!" the man once more interrupted, "No more can go into the cup!"

“Indeed, I see," answered the Zen teacher, "If you do not first empty the cup, how can you taste my cup of tea?"

And this is exactly how many of us live our lives. We sometimes carry so many preconceived notions, “baggage”, prejudice and negative clutter in our minds from our past experiences that it makes it difficult to add any positive and empowering thoughts. 

God Helps Us All.

p/s: Dares To Dream. Dares To Fail. Dares To Get Hurt. It's A Process We Had To Go Through. A simple gratitude and appraisal maybe crap to someone, but its sure give a boost to everyone; that dares to try again.

Missed the Old Me...

...Lately I've always start writing my blog in a gloomy, agony mood. Somehow it reminded me of why this "blog" was made in the first place. It kinda reminded me of things past and even though it is just a half-year past till now, sometimes nostalgic memories, things that should have been, hopes for the future and dreams seems to have faded away...

I've become a Whiner. A Loser. Hopeless Bastards.

Trying to refute a certain opinion but in reality mine are all the same. A friend of mine in a blissful moment of his life always said this, "You're thinking too much!". And to my amaze, I for once agree with him.

My father once said, "You have to learn One True Secret in Happier Life: Learning To Let Go. It is not the  same as give up. Equals that with the Hijrah our Prophet made during his early days, and believe that all we've been through is just the beginning. Time to replan and reorganise and reassess what the mistake is and I assure you, the experience will not going to waste."

My boss always said this, "Problems will not fade away, it just getting better and better. You're a fool waiting for problems to fade away. We can't run away from problems, it will keep piling up. Problems are meant to be solve, not to be blame."

"Many of the great achievements of the world were accomplished by tired and discouraged men who kept on working."

"To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure. but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing."

Enough with the quote.

I want to make my life as simple as I can. Want to keep the integrity at high, respect others for their own opinion (Agree to Disagree) and above all else trying not to think too much. Just had to keep up with the bold faces, mindlessly doing what I had to do (even-though playing truant occasionally with no guilt in my face) and hopes that time will heal the wound.

What seems to us as bitter trials are often blessings in disguise. I hold true to this word since Form One, ceramah @ tazkirah pagi from my respectable Uztaz Ramli.

p/s: Learn from yesterday. Live for today. Hope for tomorrow. Above all else, I believe that we're the one who controls our fate, not God. He just laid out the platform, we're the one who choose which path we're going to go.